For the Love of God Nintendo, Give me Arcade Punch-Out!! Already.
Our good buddies over at Nintendo Life posted a pretty good read a little while back asking a question that I’ve spent far too many nights lying awake in a sweat-stained bed, torturing my precious little mind over. Will Nintendo’s original arcade versions of their classic titles ever be made available and if so, when the F when?
Most video game veterans are familiar with the infamous “pie factory” level from the original Donkey Kong that was cut from the NES release:
The only way aside from emulation to play it in the comfort of your own filth was to find it as a secret unlockable in the fucking horror show that was Rare’s Donkey Kong 64.
But fuuuuuck that shit. I wouldn’t wish playing through Donkey Kong 64 on my worst enemy. This is where Nintendo needs to step in and back up their VC arcade service. Of course the original Donkey Kong merits an instant download but personally, Punch-Out!! arcade is what I want more than anything. I can’t tell you how I’ve longed to just beat the shit out of Pizza Pasta on the couch while eating pizza and/or pasta (Haha, Nintendo is racist against Italians).
I know, I know…the Punch-Out!! games only got better as time went on. From the legendary Mike Tyson iteration on the NES to last year’s retro love letter version for Wii. But for me Punch-Out!! will only be Punch-Out!! with me controlling a green, wire framed dude and furiously pounding the holy hell out of buttons only to have my cracker ass put to sleep by Mr. Sandman.
Is that so much to ask?
Also, throw in Super Punch-Out!! while yer at it boys. I’ve never even SEEN that machine in person.